No one could have been more surprised than me, the day I met my new love Mike.
Sure, I had started my own local dating service six months before, after losing my job back in 2004. But I was also 49, divorced, and completely disillusioned with love.
Divorce can do that to you! But I found meeting so many very cool divorcees refreshing and encouraging. Perhaps there was still hope for us all.
As a dating coach and service owner, the first challenge I faced was having too many women to match with my male clients. Men can be quite shy about admitting they need help in meeting the right woman, but I can also be pretty stubborn when it come to business success. I felt determined to find some great love matches for my women clients!
I decided to solve my inventory problem by putting my own broadly-defined profile on Match.com. I thought I might attract a few new male clients, and then tell them about the many great women I had for them to meet. Could I entice more men to join my local service?
The first man to respond was called “Tall Guy” online. He was a stand out because of his ready responsiveness, his genuine interest, and BTW, he looked pretty cute to me!
The “Tall Guy” came over to meet me on a Saturday afternoon. Nosy me, I spied on him as he got out of his bright red pick-up, trying to decide whether to hide his big bouquet of flowers behind his back as he walked up to the door.
If you have ever had the supreme pleasure of experiencing love at first sight, then you know what happened next. Ten hours later we were still talking, laughing and feeling like heaven on earth! We both felt we had finally met someone we could naturally relate to on so many amazing levels.
I will never forget the euphoria of spending so much time with Mike in those first few months after we met! We had both waited a lifetime to feel this kind of cosmic connection.
We married exactly eight months later, and to this day we acknowledge exactly how fortunate we are to be living the lives of soul mates… I mean, what are the chances?
This post is by Laura Lee Carter, and is a part of the GENFAB Blog Hop of December 5, 2012. Click on the photos below to read more real-life love stories! They are all about finding love later!
Laura Lee is the author of How To Believe In Love Again: Opening to Forgiveness, Trust, and Your Own Inner Wisdom and Midlife Magic!
LOVED this very short analysis of relationships!
The three types are:
Those who HELPED you in difficult times
Those who LEFT you in difficult times
Those who PUT you in difficult times
All of you from MY past, know where you fit in!
OK, I know you’re expecting something brilliant and complicated here, but I’ll just share a timely tip from the Queen of England.
The secret to a happy marriage is DIFFERENT INTERESTS.
The minute I heard this on TV, I ran into the other room and asked my lovely husband Mike what he thought of this idea. He said, they must be right because we are as different as a motorcycle and a Subaru!
Put another way, Mike’s favorite hobby right now is learning the extreme complications of Solid Works, a CADD program, while I struggle to fully comprehend midlife psychology and the Boomers directly effected by it.
Is that different enough for you? We all have our unique interests and even more unique skill sets. What is most important is that you find out what those are for you, and then PURSUE THEM!
Don’t be one of those couples that seems joined at the hips. You know, the ones who are so insecure that they require that they share everything. This is not a sign of relationship health, but is instead a sign of boundless insecurity in both partners.
Live and learn more about exactly who you are and then go for it! This is called “differentiation” in psychology speak, and seems to be the best sign of relationship health in the long-run.
Remember all small businesses today, and BTW I’m just about the smallest business you’re ever going to run into!
Please consider the purchase of my books as GREAT holiday gifts for your friends and family with midlife or love concerns… and help out a struggling writer today!
Just finished watching Snow White and the Huntsman. What a cool fantasy movie, with great special effects and an interesting array of metaphors from ancient European mythology. The evil old queen who will not accept aging, the young princess who still does not recognize her own beauty or power, cold and dark versus the bright beauty of spring…
The one I zeroed in on was the idea that the proper person must kiss Snow White to being her back to life. Everyone thinks she’s dead from eating the poison apple offered by the evil queen Ravenna disguised as William, her childhood friend. I’m sure you all remember the poison apple scene, but this time I saw it in a new light.
I saw it in terms of my own midlife reawakening from a deep disillusionment with love. How many of us feel completely burned out on romance and love by the time we hit 45 or 50, especially if we are recently divorced or single? I know I felt pretty hopeless, and dead to the idea that love could ever happen again in my life. I needed to find ways to reawaken my heart and open once again to the miracle of unconditional love.
I find it interesting in retrospect that my inner wisdom pushed me to do something I would never have done under ordinary circumstances. When I lost my job as an academic librarian, I started my own dating service. If you know me, you know how unlikely this outcome was but, as it turned out, this was also the perfect way for me to learn how to believe in love again!
I not only gathered lots of nice encouragement from my clients through my business, I also met the man I had been wanting to meet my entire life. Note how in Snow White, a kiss from any man would not do. Only one man could bring her back to life.
The same is even more true when looking for love later in life. It is that one man with just the right way about him and that one kiss, that can reawaken love again in you! Are you feeling any more like Snow White now?
by Laura Lee Carter, author of How To Believe In Love Again: Opening to Forgiveness, Trust, and Your Own Inner Wisdom and this blog!